Gravy (2015)

October Challenge Day 6:

Randomly plucked this one off the Horror shelves at my local video store. Not sure how I felt about the pick then, nor do I know how to feel about it now that I'm about to pop it into the DVD player.

Premise of Gravy: "A trio of costumed misfits with very special dietary requirements invades a Mexican cantina and forces the staff to engage in a late night of gluttony. The only caveat is what's on the menu ... and who will survive until morning!" (per the DVD synopsis).

It stars Sarah Silverman, so that's pretty interesting, but also note the bloody clown on the cover. Considering how we have a free-range creepy clown epidemic on our hands, and a movie titled Gravy - with questionable food being shoved in your face as the focus - it doesn't particularly pump me up but rather gives me visuals I never asked for. And I haven't had dinner yet.

I guess, actually, I'm feeling a little bit like this right now:

(...this fresco fiasco never gets old for me...)

But I'm going to give it a try anyway as I feel this experience could either delight me to no end or leave me with an upset tummy. In all, I suspect this will be an odd and gory tale with some abstract moralistic aspect... this is just a guess. I have absolutely no idea what I'm getting into here... see you after the show!

*****Update!

Okay. Alright.... well. Pass the antacids.

I do believe this is the first horror movie I've ever seen that's managed to out-hipster itself. The cult cultural references stuffed me to the brim - to the point I was making what my Husband calls: "The sad last bite faces". When you've had too much to eat, but you keep eating anyway because those last two bites are not enough to save for leftovers and you kindawanna cry face. (Note: Being too full you're in pain is a blessing that should be a gaddam right for everyone. And to be perfectly blunt, I cry when the Meals On Wheels pamphlets come in the mail. We can talk more about this later - in the mean time please take care of your neighbors.) But getting back to the film and it's hipster gluttony: 35 minutes into the film and I was DONE.

Mike side-eyed me closely. I could see it from the tops of my large, dark glasses frames. Without saying a word we both understood each other: What in the hell is this? Really? Make it stop, please.

It's a funny horror film, I just never really laughed. It's slap-stick and gory, but I was never amused by it. The one person I truly enjoyed - saying all that I found most entertaining and smart about the film - Gabourey Sidibe, a bad ass powerhouse, who many may know from American Horror Story fame -  literally had her voice taken from her, and that's when I threw the napkin on the table and walked out.

I didn't enjoy this film because it tried to be so cleverly over-the-top that it missed points entirely. It, again, outdid it's own hipster irony to the point it wasn't even fun, it was just annoying. Additionally, I had problems with the music. I liked it at the beginning but then it became too much. The independent radio station was on full blast through pretty much the entire film. I say this as a regular contributor to independent radio. It was too much, man, too much.

No, I did not enjoy this film but I see where it was trying to go. It was quirky, trying to be edgy, trying to be gory, trying to be sarcastic and ironic (all of which I was suspecting even before I put the DVD in the player) but in the end, for me, it lost all it's cool points.

I see a lot of movies like this during the year and never write a review (because I don't like writing negative reviews) but I hold a strange little bond with myself during October. Sorry guys, wanted to like it but couldn't. If you do choose to check the film out, watch with very drunk friends. Pairs with quesadillas and hard booze.

I rented this movie from my local video store (Rain City Video). Use the links under Find It. Watch It. on Horror Habit's sidebar to see where else you can find this, um, maybe you should just check it out for yourself, feature.

The Girly Ghosthunters (Television Show, 2005)

October Challenge Day 5:

In lieu of a movie tonight, I've chosen to write about a television series I binged watched last week.

I've been itching to write about The Girly Ghosthunters show since I first saw it (a whole week ago) and was afraid I wouldn't get to it until November, and then I was all like: it's my blog I do what I want.

Simply put, this collection of 13, 20 minute episodes were transforming - and I'll tell you why.

First: I know you laughed when you read: "Girly Ghosthunters". I did too. Why? What the hell is wrong with the word "girly"? Wait, wait, wait - I'm getting ahead of myself. Let's back up a bit.

Last week I was browsing through streaming apps for paranormal documentaries and TV shows to fall in love with. It's been a dry spell. I'm so devoted to this stuff that I created a Paranormal TV and Documentary page just to keep track of all the ones I've seen, loved, and want to check out. That's when I found The Girly Ghosthunters showing on Amazon Prime. My first thought: WTF is this? Then hit Play anyway.

The first episode opens with four young ladies who appear to be stealing a garden gnome from someone's yard. My second thought: WTF is this? Introductions to each of the ladies came across to me as silly, odd, and dare I say cheap.

They began their first investigation and my thoughts became verbal: "WTF is this?!" Why the screaming? Why so giggly? Why so naive? Why so scared - you're voluntarily going into frightening places and -

Just as I was about to write this show off (at around episode 4) I was hit with an emotional ton of bricks and realized:

I'M AN ASSHOLE.

WTF is wrong with me? These ladies are not much younger than me and I remember my early giggly and naive 20s well, oddly, and wait - oh my word, they are ... having fun... Why didn't I see this before!? They're absolutely totally genuine in their love for exploration, thrill of the ghost hunt, and are all best friends in real life. There's no acting here, there are no gimmicks, no taunts, teasing, or drama. They're not out to prove to the world that there are ghosts (the impossible) - with tons of equipment and serious faces. They're in a beautiful sisterhood, going on adventures with their dousing rods and spirit board, just being with each other, and taking some of the world along with the aid of one camera following them around.

In an instant I realized that I wasn't about to give these ladies a chance because they weren't like the big budget (prominently all men) shows - they didn't play by their rules. That's when I fell madly in love with The Girly Ghosthunters and I realized that I've been played by a stereotype on so many levels.

I soon located a very recently and wonderfully written article about these gals, and discovered that not only are they awesome, they are also ground breaking. Greg Newkirk, writes for the Week In Weird: "Girly Ghosthunters: How the First All-Female Paranormal Investigation Team Made Ghost Hunting History". In this fantastic article I learn more about the team, their drives, and a better overall picture of them (as seen with new eyes through their TV show):

"We were just a bunch of typical girls who watched a lot of Buffy and wore out our VHS copy of the Craft," Dana recalls. "We were nerds who were too old for summer camp and too young to do anything else, so we started doing what lots of teenage girls do - we started playing with spirit boards, pendulums, and reading books about magick, but it was ghosts that really interested us."

I also read, to my own horror, a mirror of my initial reactions and how I feared they were treated in the paranormal community: 

"People were so mean to us," Dana recalls, "There were a few psychics and paranormal researchers in the area who held events, and we were asked to do one, and got so excited. We made a big poster board, gathered up our best evidence - stuff we were really proud of. It was the only event we ever did because other investigators twice our age openly mocked us to our faces, said we were better suited for a girl band than ghost hunting, and called our evidence fake without even looking at it."...

"It takes a special kind of awful for a 30-year-old man to call a group of teenage girls 'attention whores' for no other reason than being young, female, and hunting ghosts. That actually happened. People are scarier than any supernatural monster."

This says a f***ing LOT about culture, stereotypes, sexism, and the belief that there are "rules" in paranormal investigations. Folks, I played a small part in this this assholery and I'm very sorry I did although I'm glad it was short lived. This says A LOT about how much has been ingrained in me. (that said, I feel the editing of this show played a significant role in "up playing" the young ladies as hapless, frightened women. I have an issue with the editing crew).

In all - these ladies are bad ass. I'm so glad I found them. I'm sad it was only 13 episodes but in those episodes my Mind Was Blown simply because I watched a bunch of women in their early 20's doing what I loved to do then: wander around and explore spooky buildings with some of my best friends. In fact, on the cusp of 40, I still love doing that exact same thing.

So back to the word, "Girly". Not a damn thing wrong with the word, "Girly". Oh, and to the (current) only commentator, leeleetoft, on IMDB who wrote:

"...Go out and have a drink and some potato skins and get back to us when you have more experience and can actually contribute something. Hopefully the venues you visit will not be put off and allow REAL investigators in to check things out."

BLOW ME.

I watched this series on Amazon Prime. Use the links under Find It. Watch It. on Horror Habit's sidebar to see where else you can find this simply delightful show.

PS: their garden gnome has it's own IMDB page. How awesome and hilarious is that?

What We Do In The Shadows (2014)

October Challenge Day 4:

Came home from the office today and decided at the last minute to stop off and grab a happy hour beer, eat some food, and watch an hour or so of LOL cat videos.

Happy hour came to a close, decided that was enough hilarity for the time being, paid my tab, packed up the left-overs and began to walk out of the pub.

I was in my office outfit (slacks, nice shirt, etc) in a sports bar, making my way to the door when halfway through exiting the place my shoulder bag strap broke. KERPLUNK - this big old hip-level monstrosity and all it's contents plummeted to the cement floor. It seemed like hours that I just stared at this bag and it's contents on the ground thinking:

"...do ...  do ... I  ... just *carry* it now...?"

For over 20 years I've slug a bag over my shoulders. Never in my life do I recall carrying anything that resembled a briefcase for more than a minute. I picked up everything, held my head high, grabbed the "emergencies only" handle at the top of the bag, marched out the door, and proceeded to walk the near mile home - carrying my bag like a briefcase hero (although I felt like an absolute idiot).

It was right about this time that I received a text from a best friend highly recommending the mockumentary What We Do In The Shadows. Coincidentally, I had just rented this film a couple days ago the for the specific purpose of reviewing it during my October Challenge! For nearly a year now this movie has come highly recommended to me from several different sources. 

I took this text, during a time when I was telling myself: "You don't look like an idiot carrying this briefcase bag, you don't look like an idiot carrying a briefcase bag" as a sign it was time to finally see this reported marvel of a mockumentary. Not only that but it's about a bunch of 100 + year old vampires trying to adjust to the modern world. I'm a 37 year old woman and could barely adjust to the fact that my bag turned into a briefcase. The time was ripe to watch this film.

So here we go! I'll see you after the film!*************

Oh My Word!!

LOVE THIS FILM!

So so so so smart, sharp, jam-packed with gallows humor, and a hilarious joy ride for horror fans and those who are not entirely horror fans.

Personally, they won me over when the vampires first ran into a pack of werewolves (nearly West Side Story style). Note - it got more interesting when they ran into the werewolves later...

Here we have a documentary crew (not exactly found footage) recording the "day-to-day" of four vampires living together. The dramas of assigning chores, dating, friends, living in the 21st Century, living with the living, etc., all relayed with wit, charm, and in a bloody mess.

This is a hilarious, well done, rather brilliant film. LOVED IT.

Watch with a group of smarty pants or anyone who spent too much time in the Goth clubs. Pairs with tea cups (what's in them ... questionable), raw meat, and anything that brings a bunch of enemies together.

This was in fact one of the best films to see after the silly little day I've had. I suggest plugging this one in for anyone who needs a laugh after a serious, not serious day.

I rented this movie from my local video store (Rain City Video). Use the links under Find It. Watch It. on Horror Habit's sidebar to see where else you can find this downright delicious feature.

Tom Holland's Twisted Tales (2014)

October Challenge Day 3:

I really enjoy horror movie anthologies. I think they provide just enough delicious morsels of horror to satisfy most everyone. Short, sweet, to the point, and usually oh so original.

Unfortunately, I won't throw Tom Holland's Twisted Tales into the favorites category.

To be fair, I turned this film on right when I got into a little riff with my Husband about coughing. Seriously.

I found his coughing disrupting. Alarming and disrupting. 

This discussion delayed my viewing of the film for a good half hour. After which I pressed Play and proceeded to see, immediately, three short horror films in a row about partners not getting along.

Oh for christsakes!

This likely tainted my viewing of this show. I frankly wasn't in the mood to see couples argue. And although this show initially only revolved around three short horror films about couples fighting, most every other short following had some aspect of that. 

I was just not in the mood for it and proceeded to Fast Forward my DVD through most of the movie. Another unfortunate aspect of this anthology series is that every time I hit Play, I could already determine what was going on. I didn't even need dialogue or normal pace. This made me sad.

I don't like giving movies negative reviews - at all. I aim to see all the positives and also identify aspects a film can grow from. I simply didn't have the energy to do that for Tom Holland's (who I enjoy and was great here) Twisted Tales. Angry couples being angry and it turning into a nightmare of a disaster for everyone - na. I see that in the news already, too much. Granted this horror film told and twisted those tales in a such a way that it becomes a horror film, I quite simply wasn't in the mood.

Wrong time wrong place Tom Holland's Twisted Tales! Maybe we'll meet again in a better world, when we're both a little older and wiser.

Pairs with food you can throw at others, and some silent treatments.

I rented this movie from my local video store (Rain City Video). Use the links under Find It. Watch It. on Horror Habit's sidebar to see where else you can find this unsatisfying-for-me feature.

The Visit (2015)

October Challenge Day: 2

Last night I had the evening to myself, it was dark, storming, and simply perfect for a horror film. So I popped The Visit into the DVD player, grabbed a super fuzzy blanket, and pulled the lever on the recliner.

When I saw the trailer for this film nearly a year ago, I was all like: "Oh hey! This looks interesting".

After finally seeing it I was all like: "What - what? Was there two different versions of this film? Why am I remembering a completely different story?"

Could be because there were three different cuts of this film: a comedy, a horror, and an in-between. This was apparently the in-between. There were some funny parts, and there certainly were jump scares, but in all I really didn't understand this movie.

Great acting and great atmosphere created a nice breeding ground for the cringe binge, but I'm really sad to say that I couldn't get behind the story line. I got confused, and the ending didn't wrap things up much for me either. I understood everything that was happening, just not always why - and that simply frustrated me more.

Ironically, the story revolves around the dementia symptom of "sundowning". Signs include understanding everything that's happening, just not always why - and that simply frustrates the sufferer more. No, really, dementia is heart-breaking and I'm not making fun of it. You can learn more about sundowning here. It's a very real, scary, sad thing.

This is a decent movie, I simply didn't like it. Simply put: it frustrated me. I also don't think found footage was the right format, and yet I see why it was used. 

You know, actually, I was so frustrated by the end that I watched every single bonus the DVD provided. Deleted scenes, interviews, photos - all of it. I wanted to better understand what I had just seen and hopefully find some clarification as to why I have a completely different memory of this film. Not much was clarified but I did learn to appreciate all that went into making this picture. Still frustrated, less angry.

In all, I'm still on your side M. Night Shyamalan! I never left, man. I never left - still rooting.

I would recommend seeing this film at least once because it is a decent film. It really, seriously, is a decent film. It has received a lot of positive attention and I see why - I just didn't like it as much as I wanted to.

Pairs with a classic family recipe, a box of cookies that fell in a snow bank, and fancy little cocktails. If you have some Yankee candles laying around then light 'em up! I would suggest watching this one with at least one other person.

I rented this movie from my local video store (Rain City Video). Use the links under Find It. Watch It. on Horror Habit's sidebar to see where else you can find this unique feature.